It has finally come to the time where I can count the remaining days of summer with my two hands. It's coming to an end, I'm afraid and I'm going to miss it. I have often wondered how beautiful the day can be. A specific scene in Sandman reminded me of it; you know there is a divine creator just because of something majestic as a sunset, I agree.

I sometimes find myself daydreaming again. I want to know what's going to face me once summer ends. I know the coming semester will test me again. I've shed tears last year, I'm willing to shed blood this time. The difference between the present me and the past me is that I have found something that made everything bearable. I don't know if it's the time I've spent meeting new friends in college or the adventures I have gone through for the summer, or perhaps its the building anxiety that people get when they finally realize that everything is... actually do-able.

I'm done following the path of rage. I just don't have anything to be angry about anymore. I will always have my issues with the you-know-who's but what can I really do about it? It's not like I can actually do something to make things better. People are people and you can't change them as you like. Yeah, I still don't trust a lot of people but I'm giving it a shot. God only knows, I've left myself vulnerable a couple of times and when I couldn't take it anymore, there have been those who were willing to listen at least. I guess humanity's not all bad. Maybe there's hope for me yet. I dunno, I've spent a lot of time scrutinizing about how people never change and how pointless it was to be a "good" person but now maybe it's okay for me to believe in people again. I have my issues with people like I said... but it's not like I can change them so might as well change how I perceive them right?

I've been bitten by the bug again lately. The itch, as Berk and I aptly put it. I find myself staying up later during the night in order to write. I seemed to fall apart when I tried writing stories again because my mind was clouded with rage and despair but now, it's becoming clear again. I can write the way I used to and more. I admit that I began to entertain the notion that I can only write when I'm angry or depressed and that it was nothing more but once my dark clouds have cleared I see the basics again. I just want to.

There was this quote I heard in Sister Act that struck me. "If you wake up in the morning and the first thing you think about is writing. You're a writer. You don't need no proof or anything, it's just that. You're born to be a writer" Tch, that don't beat all. Maybe I can be a writer if I want to be or maybe not but that will not keep me from writing. My soul is in what I write so I have to give it my best. Be it out of rage, sadness or the thrill of it, it's something I've grown to love as well as need.

Summer ends in 6 days...