My philo teacher said in our first class that nothing was as exciting, as well as terrifying, as a start. Starting something can mean a lot of things for a lot of different people but as he said, starting something has a certain duality in it (much like everything else in the world). Just as life begets death, a start would usually mean an end. Before anything could be started, something must come to an end. I was especially enticed by this thought.

It's like when I have to write something new. God knows how many times I tried to write a story only to have it discarded later on and while starting a new story can seem like absolute bliss, there is still the fact that I have to set aside my past work for the new one to grow. I had to leave characters, sets and plot but more importantly, the passion I had for that specific story. I also remember how Sir Mauchi said that before typing the first word of a blank page, everything was possible. It's like being in some primordial void where you are waiting for the first spark of something to embelish - for that moment, you feel like God. Yet, as word by word, sentence by sentence, paragraph by paragraph manifest into written word, the option or the flexibility of your creation seem to narrow into one path and this path, follows into an end of sorts.

It just shows how small everything can be. Given a path or a destiny, we will just have one course in life with no "drawing board" to go back to. It kinda sucks. I mean, wouldn't anyone want to go back in time, fully knowing the things he/she should avoid having done? Wouldn't you want to go back to being God? Personally, given the chance, I'd do it then again, wouldn't anyone? But when I think about it, if everyone would go back to re-do his mistakes... it wouldn't be a life at all. If we all just kept going further back what ending can we ever arrive in, moreover what new beginning can present itself when we find ourselves unable to move forward?

I guess in the greater scheme of everything, there is no such thing as turning back but instead there is a constant cycle of start and ends. We cannot go back and undo our mistakes - the only choice we have is to just move on. Tabularasa, as our philo class put it - to forget everything and start over. I guess for people to move forward one has to acknowledge to the self that they are going to start something as well as admit that it is also the end of what had previously been done.

We can start as a god yet as we go down the path of life -of experience- we realize that we are not gods at all, we're only human; as humans, we are allowed mistakes and we are always given the option to learn from them. Life's just that one path we take where we hopefully reach an end that makes it all worthwhile.