Just sharing... this was the introductory lines of Sexton Furnival from the comic Death: The High Cost of Living. I especially liked this piece because it reminds me of well... me.

"My name is Sexton Furnival, but I'm pretty much used to it by now, and this is the last thing I'm going to write. This is because there's no point to anything, and I've thought about this hard and long."

"Okay. I figure, I'm mature. I know my own mind. I'm sixteen -- almost sixteen and a half. And what have I got to show for it?"

"For a start, I don't have anybody I'm in love with"

"To be honest, I think love is complete bullshit. I don't think anyone ever loves anyone. I think the best people ever get is horny; horny and scared, so when they find someone who makes them horny, and they get too scared of the world outside, they stay together and they call it love."

"Second, I don't have anyone I hate"

"I mean, I know a hell of a lot of assholes. But that's all they are. Assholes"

"There's no one I know who's evil. I mean, in books and movies you get the bad guy, and you know immediately who the bad guy is because, well, he's bad. And you've got the good guy and it doesn't matter what he goes through, he knows who the bad guy is."

"And I don't even have a faithful sidekick"

"Well, you may not think this stuff is very interesting, or a reason to end it all, or anything, but you're wrong. Well, maybe not all wrong about it not being interesting, but you're wrong about it not being a good reason for checking out early."

"I mean, there's no point to anything. And if there's no point, you might as well be dead. It's not as if anybody's going to give two shits."

Ah nothing like buying a new comic to indulge in. My parents actually bought this one for me which was such a great surprise. Finally, I have a comic that features Death on it. It's such a cool read. Death is so pretty and she says things that make you just really like her -- it's kind of creepy. But I guess most of the people who read this blog don't know what I'm talking about because well, they don't read comic books. I find it such a shame that people don't read comic books as well as they read books or computer games...

I like the way Sexton wrote his suicide note. Not that I would like to write one of my own anytime soon but the point is, the things he said actually make a lot of sense -- for me anyways. It kinda reminds me of those lonely emo days of mine where I minimalize emotions and feelings into nothing. Love turns into nothing, so does hate and THAT made everything easier to deal with but the truth is, I scared myself by doing that. As Sexton stated... what then would life be worth without those things? Because at that instant, I have seen what it felt like not to live. If pain didn't exist - nor did love - life wouldn't be anything more than eating to stay alive and sleeping to rest. What would the point of living be then if there was nothing to look forward to, to move on from, or to repent for?

I can't give away the ending for this comic (because it's good enough to be a tease) but Sexton changes after meeting Death in her once-per-century affair. For the better at least, finding something about life that made it worthwhile -- The High Cost of Living as the title stated. It's always... something to look forward to.